So, on Friday night, there we were – me and Psycho Momia, getting all up in it, and being like
When I turn my head, and “oh fuck.” There’s oldest daughter.
Red lights, warning sirens, depressurization pumps at full capacity…
Welp, let’s just say the disturbed psyche wouldn’t let things progress any further that night.
We have a great day Saturday, as it’s one of the rare days we are both off. We are both, naturally, more than a little flirty and such. I get the wee girls down for bed (finally! Smallest child has been most difficult lately.), and we settle in for a night of “grown up time”.
Cut to this morning – after I’ve left for work. Oldest (again!) tells Psycho Momia, “I sneaked downstairs last nite to go pee. You and Dada were watching a movie…I think it was a grown-up movie cuz it had a lady in it.” Would you, dear reader, like to make a guess at the kind of movie we were watching? Psycho Momia asks her if she wanted to ask any questions, and her response went like this: “No. But Mama, Maybe when I’m older, I can watch it with you…”
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BRAIN SCREAMS IN PAIN!!!!!!!!!!
How Much more proof do you need to know that the American “culture” is doomed and dying? A fucking kids book about plastic surgery?
‘My Beautiful Mommy’ is aimed at kids ages four to seven and features a plastic surgeon named Dr. Michael (a musclebound superhero type) and a girl whose mother gets a tummy tuck, a nose job and breast implants. Before her surgery the mom explains that she is getting a smaller tummy: ‘You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn’t fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael is going to help fix that and make me feel better.’
(Try I got lazy and old. So I’ll pay someone to hack me up so that I look like something from a toy store)
Mom comes home looking like a slightly bruised Barbie doll with demure bandages on her nose and around her waist.
The text doesn’t mention the breast augmentation, but the illustrations intentionally show Mom’s breasts to be fuller and higher. ‘I tried to skirt that issue in the text itself,’ says Salzhauer. ‘The tummy lends itself to an easy explanation to the children: extra skin and can’t fit into your clothes. The breasts might be a stretch for a six-year-old.’
I’m all for elective surgery. It’s how I plan on living forever, after all. But pimping cosmetic surgery to children is just fucking ludicrous. By the time they are sixteen, they’ll be wanting boobjobs, ass implants, liposuction, and permanent makeup. All to conform to someone else’s idea of what they should look like.