Tag Archives: Sex

Quote of the fucking week

Out of left field comes this:

I felt the audiophile CD. But it wasn’t warm. It was a silicone tit, not the real thing. Real boobs sag. The girls think we hate this. Along with stretchmarks and that roll of fat around their middle. Whereas this makes girls real. They’re built with a higher percentage of body fat. They’re made to give birth, to nurture. Who’d want to sleep with a ten year old boy? A STARVING ten year old boy?

A woman built for the media orders a salad and picks at it. A real woman savors her food, she evidences sensuality. Something that’s hard to see, but all men pick up on. The same way it’s hard to quantify why vinyl sounds so much better than CDs. You just FEEL IT!

From Bob Lefsetz, a cranky old A&R/Music industry guy.

He sums up something I’ve been saying for years. Yeah, I know I’m not the only one. But, it’s something that’s been on my mind alot since a conversation at work last week. One of my coworkers is in his late 20’s – and has never had a girlfriend. Here’s the deal – he’s more bear than Brad, if you catch my drift. Yet, if a woman is more the 5’5″ and 120lbs – she’s “unattractive”, and would never do. IMNSHO, he has reduced the field of possible applicants for the position of girlfriend to less than one percent, because of his buy-in to the media’s ridiculous female image. First up, there the problem of finding a breathing human who actually looks like that – when the “models” don’t even. They’re made up, strapped in, taped up and photoshopped beyond belief. They have surgery, injections, eating disorders. They are made, not grown. Add to that that that type of superficial female human will generally have the same falsified “ideal man”, and the shaggy haired, bearded 5’10” 250 pound guy has a negligible chance of ever meeting MS. Right.

When I mentioned that, his response was, “Oh, so I should just settle for someone who doesn’t meet my standards, then.” No, dude – your standards are unrealistic. Examine them and adjust them to the real world – or follow the road of plastic surgery, extreme dieting and move to where the “pretty people” live. Change yourself one way or the other.

I told him that some of the coolest chicks in the world hang out at Renn Faires – and his response was those chicks are all fat and scary. Yep some women at Faire are definately obese. Some horrendously so. Most are not. And if by scary, you mean unafraid to be themselves, to assert themselves, to be interested in more than soap operas, hair salons and keeping house, yep.

Bah. Fuck drag racing. I’ll stick to rally racing. Curves, hills, valleys and interesting scenery along the way. The journey becomes the destination – and the long winding road is the best way to get there.

Watch and Listen

Snippets of things:

True Blood Review

New Vamp show from HBO and Alan Ball (Six Feet Under).
Set in a backwoods Louisana town, the first 2 episodes of this series have been Magnificent! Good character development, great writing, above par acting, hot sex scenes (damned near hardcore porn, I tells yah) and good music. Makes me want to get HBO…
As an added bonus, the song played over the credits has become a resounding mindbug. Trust me on this one – go and buy Jace Everett’s Old New Borrowed Blues. It’s (I believe) his Second record, and IMNSHO, far better than his first. The version of “Bad Things” in the show is from his first record, but the newer version has more power in my mind.
Bad Things (new version)
BAd Things (original release)

Metallica: Death Magnetic

I never thought that I would give a shit about Metallica again. The Atrocities that have been Metallica records since the second half of the Black Album had me prescribing several remedies, never expecting them to happen – as the almighty dollar almost always wins over artistic integrity.

  1. Fire Bob Rock. He’s a good pop producer, but wouldn’t know metal if it bit him.
  2. Get James a Beer and a Shot.
  3. Tell Lars to “sit the fuck down, Shut the Fuck up, and play your drums”

Looks like they did 2 out of three, because “DM” fucking rules. Like Mike Portnoy of Dream Theater said, “This is the record I’ve been waiting 20 years for!” Metallica have finally remembered who they are and how they got here.

The site

As part of the aforementioned various and sundry shit that has been affecting me, many pieces of Tattooed Dad 2.0 were never finished. They will be soon. I will be posting at least weekly, and more when celestial bodies aline. For those of you who have stuck by me while I sorted shit out, I thank you.


So, on Friday night, there we were – me and Psycho Momia, getting all up in it, and being like

When I turn my head, and “oh fuck.” There’s oldest daughter.
Red lights, warning sirens, depressurization pumps at full capacity…

Welp, let’s just say the disturbed psyche wouldn’t let things progress any further that night.

We have a great day Saturday, as it’s one of the rare days we are both off. We are both, naturally, more than a little flirty and such. I get the wee girls down for bed (finally! Smallest child has been most difficult lately.), and we settle in for a night of “grown up time”.

Cut to this morning – after I’ve left for work. Oldest (again!) tells Psycho Momia, “I sneaked downstairs last nite to go pee. You and Dada were watching a movie…I think it was a grown-up movie cuz it had a lady in it.” Would you, dear reader, like to make a guess at the kind of movie we were watching?
Psycho Momia asks her if she wanted to ask any questions, and her response went like this: “No. But Mama, Maybe when I’m older, I can watch it with you…”


Not Bleedin’ Likely.