We still haven’t heard anything about Psycho Momia‘s ride. But we have mostly adjusted to not having it anymore. Through the kindness of a friend, we have unlimited use of a car, which takes a lot of the stress off.

We have also come to the conclusion that we won’t be able to send both girls to montessori in the fall. It’s just too much money. Oldest child will have to go to public school, where she will do fine, but maybe not learn as much or as easily. On the flip side, Psycho Momia is looking into possibly becoming a Montessori Teacher.

Coming up is an all night gaming session with Agrippa and Zen Bones. I am thoroughly looking forward to it.
In a fun backwards look, my last post about sex and the parent, stimulated (heh) some interesting conversations. That, and a couple of other things, brought us back to life. Naturally, due to the perverse nature of the universe, we are smashingly horny – and I’m sick, with the worst of it happening at night.

Sometimes, ya just can’t win.

Speaking of winning, Obama was sworn in the other day. Lots of money was wasted. lots of very powerful, yet empty crap was said, and the separation of church and state was again mocked. Meanwhile, politics continued on in it’s normal fashion. His administration reiterated that the bullshit telecom immunity will be upheld, as more info that the NSA basically raped the US datastream, building dossiers or everyone with a net or phone connection came out. He publishes info that says former lobbyists won’t be working in related offices, and yet, the nominee for deputy defense secretary used to work for Raytheon.
No bailouts have been killed, no pullouts have happened, more taxes are being proposed, more spending of money on useless shit is being planned.
Change. Yeah right.

Housing issues – no, we aren’t moving, nor is there problems finically there. It’s just the constant struggle to find the ways to make time to make the improvements and repairs that are needed. And then there’s the whole insurance thing. Due to some weirdness of the insurance companies, we have two policies on the property – one for each dwelling. They used to be on the same carrier – but the Carrier decided that since we had 2 claims in 7 years (small ones, too) – that they only want part of our business, and that they’d cancel the fire insurance on the back house. WTF? They still have full insurance on the main house, and liability on the back house, but I have to deal with a different carrier for fire. I don’t get it.

I guess maybe I was wrong about the whole point of having insurance.

The same curses I lob at those fine folk are also being thrown at the medical industry. Bunch of cheats, liars and thieves.

I’ve come to the conclusion that while I have a plethora of skills, they are mostly not salable. I have a ton of useful knowledge, a decent set of brains, and a good set of hands. What I lack is the ability to sell myself in a beneficial manner. Worse yet, I lack the desire to do so. I like to show what I can do, I like to do what I can do. Getting someone to buy it? Not so much.

Psycho Momia and I have been suffering a bit on the intimacy scale as well. This has it’s roots in several places. One is the time factor. Generally speaking, We just ain’t on the same schedule. I think we’ve had one day off together in the last six weeks – and that was smallest ones birthday. Another root stems from the aforementioned situation with the red tape. PArtially from the fact that dealing with these people (and I use that term loosely) makes me loathe humanity in general, and partially from knowing I screwed the pooch so badly. Kind of tramples the self worth, ya know? And then there’s the purely physical aspect. Suddenly, I am hyper aware of the fact that I’ve gotten more than a bit bulgy about the midsection. Don’t like it, but like the idea of going to the gym far less. I may start riding a bike soon – if I can find the time to do so. I need to start exercising – and I don’t want to. I’ve never been the kind of person who wants to do it just for the sake of it.

On top of all that, I am about to turn 40. Which is leading to all sorts of introspection. I’m pretty good at not comparing myself to others, and only holding myself up to my own light. But, my light is fucking harsh. And I have in part become a grumpy curmudgeon. And I don’t much like that, so I’m changing it. I ain’t about to become all sweetness and light, but I will be more tolerant and upbeat, dammit!

One part of the 40 thing is I wanted a big ass party. I figured that I deserved it, because on the whole, I’ve done alright with the hand I was dealt to start. So I get myself all excited about the idea, and start telling folks about it. I sent out a massive email, contacted folks on the various social networks, etc. Psycho Momia and I start talking about it, and then we got hit with a couple of eye opening, bowel loosening accounts due. As responses began to come in, I was running about a 65% “sorry, can’t make it” rate – including folks who had confirmed previously. Which didn’t help. At All. So I canceled it. Screw it, I thought. I’ll just sulk. I don’t need to have a party with lots of people.

The amazing thing? And the thing which will end this on a good note? The sheer number of folks who responded to the cancelation emails with concern. Thank you folks (you know who you are) for caring. And I’ll be better, doc as soon as I am able!
(can anyone guess what song that line comes from?)

Item: Having a song on infinite repeat in your head is bad.

Item: Having Sheryl Crow covering Bryan Adams stuck in your head is infinitely bad.

Well, in the ensuing thread, people said some pretty fucking stupid ass things. As I did not wish to bloody up my friend’s house (he runs the fora where this happened), I chose to send him the following email.

(Names have been excised to protect the guilty)

For both of our sakes, I shall refrain from responding to the conspiracy post in public.
I am not, as I’m sure you are aware, a conspiracy nut. I keep an open mind, and draw conclusions based upon the evidence provided, my own observations, and my admittedly cynical view of human nature.

However, when undereducated, wal mart shopping, white trash talking, non honorable people call those who exercise their freedom of speech (even if they do so by pointing out strange “coincidences” and asking you to think about them) “terrorists” and “worse than Al Queda”, I find myself wishing to fall back on my own backwoods raising, and convince them of the error of their ways via the use of a nail studded 2×4.

Please understand, my brother, that my fury is NOT directed at you.
Peace would not be served by my responding there, so I must share why I shall not rise to your poke in private.

When I do see you, I am, however, gonna open a kinger can o’ whoopass on ya! };-)

To be sure, I am open to all ideas, and listen closely, fact check (to the best of my ability), and make my own decisions. I do not believe in anything just because someone says it’s so. That’s for republicans, democrats, and greens.

Willful ignorance pisses me off almost as much as….

Well, the only thing that gets my dander up as much is violence directed at children.

Well, that and bad porn.

My original hopes for this site was to be a gathering place for non trad dads – writers, musicians, actors, artists, the guy who works overnights, so he can be home with his kids during the day. The programmer who works from home so he can be available to his kids. The salesman who has to travel, and be away from his kids – and hates every minute of it.
That brings us to the last meaning: every dad is (sometimes) a prick (just ask their wives). The men, the fathers, the dads I wanted to gather together in a support system – a learning system –
they are

A Thousand Little Pricks.

Together, we can be more. We can change the way the society looks at men who care for their children first, and conventional “wisdom” last.